144.8 Wednesday …..

Everyone is doing the best he can…..That was the lesson from my personal development today. Everyone is doing the best he can. Even if it doesn’t appear that way they really are.  Good words to learn to live by. If only I could figure that out.

Today was my blood draws and infusion. I am so happy that day is over!! I am actually feeling very relieved and I fully believe I will be able to sleep tonight. Thankful the hubby he came with me this time. It helped me be more talkative and distracted. I always cry a little when they try to get the iv in. I still shed a few tears but much less this time. I told him that I wanted him to take a picture of me. I wanted to do the “Jill Whelan” face from the movie “Airplane”

IMG-1107

That is as good as I could do. If you are going to be miserable you may as well find a way to make it fun, right?

Blood work came back good. I still have osteopenia and there is change in my spine but not enough to have to change my meds. So all in all it was a good week. I think my lipids are not lower so I am sure my PCP will be calling me soon about that. Bleh. Oh well one thing at a time.

I had to fast for my appointment so my whole day of food is off. Very off. This is how it played out:

Plain coffee (fasting) Get to work around 11:15AM go and get an almond butter Protein Puck. It was stale and I couldn’t chew it. I managed to get about 1/2 of it down. I really wanted an espresso but hubby drove me and so I didn’t have the car. I settled for coffee with almond milk. Wasn’t that good. Someone offered me a chocolate truffle and I ate that. it was good.

Lunch rolled around and it was kale and cabbage salad with green olives and feta dressing. I added tomatoes too. Had one cup of bake pasta. Shared some of Scott’s chips and salsa again.

After lunch I had another cup of coffee. This time with almond milk and sugar. Yes sugar.

Got home after work and had to bake the cookies pictured above. Ginger spice. Made them spicier this time, more ginger and allspice. Hubby said they were spicier.

Anyway while baking I made dinner. Two cheese crisps, 2 Angry Orchard hard ciders, 10 nonpareil chocolates and two ginger spice cookies. No wonder my cholesterol isn’t getting better :/

The GOOD things I did today was YOGA with my friend Ginny and 150 ounces of water. That makes me happy. That and infusion is done!

How did you do?

145.8 Tuesday:What is wrong with me…

Give your best regardless of who is watching. That is what I read today in my personal development. I am being as honest as I can on this blog on what I eat and it is definitely not ‘my best’ Bleh. Here it is in it’s full glory.

Coffee w/creamer (almond milk) 2

Vanilla super foods shake with spinach, almond butter and blueberries.

Work coffee with almond milk, two.

1 and 1/2 ounces of chocolate covered almonds.

Lunch: kale salad with poppy seed dressing and four little tomatoes. 1 cup of pasta from last night. Giant pretzel with cheese dip. Five large Fritos with salsa #thanksscott

One cup of decaf coffee with almond milk.

Get home. I have the CHOICE to eat healthy OR stuff my face since I have to fast for blood work and my infusion tomorrow. I opt for stuffing my face.

This is how dinner played out: Smartfood white cheddar popcorn; one serving. Two cheese crisps. One Angry Orchard hard cider. Two Welches fruit snacks.

WHAT.IS.WRONG.WITH.ME?

My excuses have been the stress and anxiety of my upcoming appointment tomorrow. So the question lies; will I stop eating like this AFTER the weigh in and blood work and infusion tomorrow? I guess we will know soon enough.

I did get my yoga in today and 150 ounces of water.

Monday. Dexa scan 146.8….

Had my dexa scan today, maybe deca scan.. It is a bone density test. It is one of the easiest appointments I could possibly ever have on this cancer journey of mine. No calcium 24 hours prior and no metal, buckles, or zippers. I wore my workout pants and my wireless bra. Turns out I still had to take my bra off since it had metal hooks. I did put on my work shoes and long socks so I looked quite hilarious in the waiting room. Black knee-length workout pants and socks with cups of coffee on them! Oh well. Made the appointment go easier. I had to turn my left foot in and then the technician strapped my foot in place. It was just funny when she asked me to turn the foot in then explained that she would “secure” it in place. No matter, it went smoothly and hopefully when I see the oncologist  on Wednesday it will have good results.

I am super stressed out about the Wednesday appointment. I know it is what is driving me to eat too much and hot flash too much and not sleep well. Bleh..

This is how my food played out for the day along with emotions too:

Coffee with unsweetened vanilla almond milk; two cups. Chocolate super foods shake with spinach, blueberries and almond butter.

After my appointment I get to work later than usual (duh) and make a cup of coffee with the last of the maple almond milk creamer. Then one cup with almond milk.

Lunch was kale/cabbage salad, one and half cups with pumpkin seeds and dried cranberries, 1 tablespoonful. Had four cherry tomatoes and poppy seed dressing too. The dressing was about 2 tablespoonful and a splash of water to thin it out.

Ate humus and pita chips too. Love the salt. I find it very comforting.

After lunch I enjoyed one of those Lindt chocolate truffles. I really wanted an Almond Joy but we were out of stock. Really hoping after Wednesday I will have less bad cravings and less hot flashes.

Got home and the popcorn the hubby had ordered from Amazon came in. He shared a bag with me. Smartfood White Cheddar popcorn. It was very good! I may have to snag another bag from him tomorrow.

I opened a bottle of Angry Orchard Knotty Pear and started making dinner. Dinner took a long time so I opened another bottle.

I made more of the baked pasta for dinner tonight. This time I used butternut squash instead of carrots in the sauce. It is strictly because I was out of carrot puree so I had to improvise. I still had a bag of cauliflower puree in the freezer so I had that in there too. I steamed a cup of broccoli to accompany my pasta. (pictured above)

So I am counting that as two servings of veggies. That means I had three and half servings of veggies today. At least that is how I am logging it.

Water is at 125 ounces and I did a yoga practice today too.

How did you do?